My Mama
1945 December 9th is a super special day to me. It is my mother’s birthday. Since my mother transitioned, it has become one of the hardest days to navigate. I planned on writing an elaborate post about my mom, but as December grew closer, my heart grew heavier, so I chose to give myself time to work through my emotions.
What truly stands out for me, right in this moment, is how much God & my mom have stood by me.
They have given me reasons to be happy, to see this day as a day of celebration.
2015 My mom was on home hospice. I just moved into my first home. The house was an absolute mess. I busied myself by tidying up, my mother and I were talking like we usual do when she (out of nowhere) says “Cookie (my nickname from childhood) I could really see you owning your own business”. I stopped cleaning to look up at her, because WHAT? Where did that come from? I never discussed being a business owner, ever. I didn’t know how to respond because it just didn’t make sense, and I didn’t want to hurt her feelings by looking at her like she lost her mind. My mom passed away shortly after we had that conversation. I truly did not remember that conversation until recently.
2021 I knew I wanted to start my own business as a birthworker, this came to me randomly & for some reason, I did not hesitate to make an exit plan from my full-time job. I spent years saving to make the transition, and I officially completed my doula training in December. I immediately filed paperwork to obtain my LLC. On December 9th, 2021 my LLC was official.
2023 On December 9th, I attended my last birth for 2023. A beautiful little girl named Heavenly was born. As I left the birth, my client wished my mother a happy heavenly birthday.
When I tell you I cried. I cried as soon as I left the hospital. My eyes looked like little hamburgers when I got home. So many emotions, sadness, happiness, gratitude, pride, pain, just everything.
I wanted to call my mom so bad. I wanted to tell her about the family that brought new life into the world on her birthday. What were the chances!
I don’t believe in coincidences; life is too deep for that. I see the work the universe does on my behalf, through my family, through God, through my clients. To find healing through grief, is a blessing. I’m ending the year on such a beautiful note.
I love you mommy, thank you <3
My Mommy :)
“Through helping families see their strength & courage, I have discovered my own. Through helping families heal from their trauma(s), I have been able to heal. Through helping families navigate through their grief, I have found peace.”
